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Everyone thinks of a supermom as being this perfect human being; beautiful and well put together, being apart of PTA, making cupcakes for the school bake sale, working full time, having gourmet dinner ready at 5pm every night, and running the kids around to sports practice and music lessons.
But, guess what? She’s got flaws, too. Everyone does! You need to realize that what you see on the outside (in instagram photos, facebook posts, or anything else she’s showing off to the world about how great a mom she is) is only part of the picture. She is, of course, probably a great mom, as well! But, you are too!
You don’t have to look like a supermom to everyone you know to be a supermom to your children!
If you feel like you’ve been slacking in the super mom department lately, I’ll help redirect you to some things you can do to start feeling like a super mom, again!
How to be a SUPER MOM!!!
Fill Your Cup First
By taking some time each day for self care, you can be at your best to care for others!
This means you have to get enough sleep; whether that means you get 6 hours of interrupted sleep each night because you’re still breastfeeding a baby, or you’re able to get 9 hours of perfectly sound beauty sleep. This will look different for everyone, so don’t go comparing the amount of sleep you get to the perfect amount of sleep that you should get each night.
You also need to pay attention to what you eat, and care about what you put into your body, along with regularly exercising! You can only get out of your body what you put into it; and you can’t go as far on chips and cookies as you can on salads and smoothies!
And, if you don’t fit exercise into your day, then you may start to feel more tired and even weak! No good for being a mommy! Our bodies adjust to keep up with our physical activities. So, if we don’t exercise then our bodies won’t want to do anything. On the contrary, if we keep up an exercise regimen, then we’ll have more energy to exercise…and to chase after our little ones!
You should also find some ‘me time’ during the day to do something for yourself. You deserve it! And, it’ll help you be a nicer mommy, if you’re nice to yourself first! This could be anything from taking 5 minutes to read an interesting post you found on pinterest (while you’re nursing a child), to writing a book, or anything else you can think of that is just for you!
Focus on Your Family
When you take care of yourself, you’ll have more energy to take care of others, such as your family!
To be a supermom, it’s pretty obvious you shouldn’t be selfish, or make decisions that will affect others in your family with thinking of them first. Even if you don’t think the decision will make much of a difference for them; it’s still a good idea to think of them before making it.
From small decisions, like making a grocery list, to larger decisions, like whether you should work or be a stay at home mom; you need to think of your children and spouse before making them. You need to focus on your family; their thoughts, feelings, needs, and wants, sometimes even before your own.
Being a supermom means being selfless, and giving your all to your family. Now, I’m not saying you should give up being you and give up doing things you want. You should absolutely be you, you’re awesome! Just be a you who always has their family in mind! (And, a you who gets to enjoy some ‘me time’ each and everyday to keep your cup full, so you can give more to your family!)
Being intentional, doing one thing at a time, and actually only focusing on that ONE thing, seems to be something that is getting harder and harder to do in our culture. Now, this isn’t necessarily our faults. But, in a way it is. And, it has a lot to do with our smartphones!
I think it’s harder now, than ever before, to be intentional and keep our focus on any ONE thing at a time. There’s the constant notifications from our phones, telling us that we’re going to miss something if we don’t check it right away. And, with the growing need for constant connection, we don’t want to be the only one to miss out on what’s going on in our own virtual world!
But, how much do you actually get done, when you’re constantly checking your phone? And, how do your kids feel when you’re supposed to be paying attention to them, or playing with them; but, you stop every two minutes to check your phone or like something on Facebook?
They don’t like it! (Unless, of course, they’re teenagers and doing the same thing to you.) But, if they’re younger, they may feel like they’re not as important to you as your phone is. That is not a message we want to send our kids with our bad phone checking habits. We don’t really mean to do it; we just hear the notifications and have an urge to check them.
So, be more intentional with how you spend your time with your family, or with your kids! Turn your phone on do not disturb, or silent; or you know what, just leave it in another room! Focus on your child during their special time with you. Facebook and Instagram will still be waiting for you, and honestly those apps don’t care if you don’t respond right away. Your kids on the other hand, need to feel loved and need one on one attention without feeling like they are a distraction.
Remember to focus on your family, and be intentional by giving them your full, and undivided, attention!
Be a Good Role Model!!
Another thing about being intentional; be cautious about how you act and speak around your children. It’s like ‘monkey see, monkey do’ with them. Seriously! Especially when they’re little, but maybe even more so when they’re teenagers….
If you don’t want them to sneak sweets before dinner; don’t you dare do it. (They’ll do it, too. Believe me, this has happened in my house….my older daughter and I can sniff out chocolate like our lives depended on it.)
If you don’t want them talking inappropriately; don’t you dare do it.
If you don’t want them to be or talk mean towards others; don’t you dare do it!!!
Are you getting the pattern? Do what you expect them to do! Eat your veggies, be nice, talk nice, pay attention to them while they talk…..Just be a good example for them!
They learn the most important things in life from you. You give them what no formal education can. And, that’s showing them what’s appropriate and what’s not, how they should think of and treat others. You show them, either by your actions or words, what the right way to be is. And, actions speak louder than words!
Your children will pick out what you do and copy you; you don’t get to choose what they copy, so make sure you’re alright with everything they may possibly choose!
Instill a Work Ethic
Along with teaching them how to be, in general by behaving and speaking how you want them to behave and speak; it’s also important, as a supermom, to instill a good work ethic in your children.
It can be hard to feel like a ‘supermom’ when you can’t get your kids to lift a finger around the house, or do their homework before it’s due.
Personally, I feel like I have a great work ethic (I’m sure many people feel this way about themselves). And, I know I got my work ethic from my parents. When I was growing up my dad was always working, whether it be at his job or a side job working on someones car. And, my mom ran a home daycare. I still, to this day, don’t understand how she was able to do that. I remember times in the summer when there were 10 kids at the house; it was crazy!
And now, with my own daughters, or at least my 5 year old, I can see some of my work ethic rubbing off on her. I was recording a presentation for a virtual mom summit back in the beginning of April, and she started trying to record her own videos on her tablet. It was adorable; she was trying to use the same words I was. Since then, she’s been using an old laptop to type on and ‘work’, just like mommy. It makes me so proud to have a daughter who wants to work! Even though right now she just thinks of it as fun. (Honestly, it is a lot of fun! Whoever said you can’t have fun while attempting to earn a living?!)
So, don’t be afraid to show your children how much you love your work, or what you do for a living; it’s an important concept for them to learn. The earlier they learn a work ethic, the stronger it can be. It’ll help shape them as they grow into independent and responsible adults.
Always have Their Back!
As important as instilling a work ethic in your children is; it’s even more important for you to back them up with everything they do!
You guide them through life and help them make their own decisions. You need to back them up on those decisions, even if you wouldn’t choose what they did.
Support your children in every way that you can; let them know you truly care about them and trust their decisions. If they end up making a poor decision; they’re the ones who will have to deal with the consequences, and learn from those consequences. Like staying up late playing games, instead of studying for an exam, or pushing their little sister and their little sister pushing them back harder…sooner or later they’ll learn from their mistakes.
So, just do your part; guide and support them!
You’re already a Supermom!
Being a supermom isn’t really what it may seem like at first thought! It’s more about your relationship with your children and enjoying your own life! Showing your children how great life is and what they can do to achieve happiness and joy from life.
And, simply by reading this and wanting to be a better mom; you’re a supermom!
Being a supermom is not about having a crazy busy schedule and doing all the things. And, it’s not about showing off to the world all you can accomplish in a 24 hour period to make others feel like they’re less of a mom for not being able to do so much. That’s just not very lady like!
Plus, those moms who look like supermoms on the outside now, won’t be able to keep it up once their children are grown.
So, simply take care of yourself and care for your children. Don’t allow others to judge you and don’t compare yourself to others.
This is your life, and your motherhood!! Enjoy it as much as you can; our kids won’t stay kids forever.
But, you can always be their supermom!!
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Why I’m NOT a Bad Mom (even though my 5 year old drank my coffee)
10 Tips to actually ENJOY Your Day as a Stay at Home Mom